Body Confidence with an Insecure Male.

Now when you think body confidence it is likely that females come into your thoughts but I just want other males and closed minded people to know that males can face these body confidence issues. As someone going to be a teacher one day, body positivity is a message that needs to be pushed across the curriculum as well as all mental health. Anxiety needs to be spoken about and confidence needs to thrive. I am so passionate as this has affected me for many years!

I can’t even lie when I say the whole holiday, I worried about my appearance and even refused to take my top off at the poolside. I normally deal fine with this issue however I have developed stretch marks on my upper arms and feel like I’m on a whole new level of insecurity!

On the cruise, all the guys my age were toned af and that made me feel worse. I hid my body and only managed to get into the pool... 2 or 3 times the full week. This shouldn’t have been the case and I should have just gone for it but I’ve hit a new level of embarrassment. I just feel sad. I know I can just go on a diet and lose some weight but even the thought of that depresses me.

The week at the hotel did not solve this problem. Most people were Germans. All Germans boys seemed to be skinny af. This made me even worse. I had people looking at me already because I was speaking English and I just couldn’t do it. I have sat with my top on and only taken it off once over the two days I’ve been here. I just can’t do it! I wish I could just have an urge of confidence but that doesn’t seem to be happening.

Thanks for Reading Today!

Ross

Recent Events!

Recently I have been to a lot of different events and I just feel I need to share.

Here is a selection of photos of concerts I have attended in the Month of June.

Taylor Swift - reputation Stadium Tour - Manchester

Possibly one of the best concerts I have ever attended! Taylor Swift is some live performer and I am so happy that I had this opportunity to see her live. Highlights have to be Look What You Made Me Do, This is Why We Can't Have Nice Things and Don't Blame Me. The stage was amazing and it was just a great atmosphere.

Demi Lovato - Glasgow

Demi Lovato has incredible vocal talent, however, we seen her after she had postponed a few gigs due to no voice and she wasn't able to reach the high notes! She was still amazing and I would totally go and see her again in the future! Highlights had to be confident and Tell Me You Love Me.

Katy Perry - Glasgow

I was actually surprised at how good Katy Perry was live. The stage was incredible and her voice was heavenly. She entertained all and provided a great night out! I also cannot get Katy Perry out of my head so it was a success. Highlights were Roar, Swish Swish and Chained to the Rhythm.

Thanks for Reading Today!

Ross

Thank You Toxic Friendship

This is a letter to the person who has ruined the last few months for me and spoiled the end of college for me but also a thank you for creating a better me who has learned that gal... I don’t need you.

Months of complaining and moans about opportunities that people would kill for and calling me two faced at every opportunity you could. How do you think that made me feel and still you want to say that we were best friends? Then you would phone me if I never replied to texts or phone me because you had another self-obsessed thought. No. That’s not want I want.

You complain that I don’t ask about your life a lot but when I tried to come to you about my attacks and how I needed some help you would change the subject to yourself. About things that were not relevant and were some of the biggest lies I’ve ever heard. The person who claims to have helped me... you did anything but that back then... you were horrible. It was toxic. You wanted to make others hate me because you were jealous that I was able to talk to other that you claimed were horrible and that you had no time for when you had never listened to them or asked their stories.

But I need to thank you. You’ve created a brand new me who doesn’t give two shits about people like you anymore. I have no time for those who spread lies and call me a liar. I have no time for those who are self-obsessed. I have no time for... you.

You ruined this friendship. Not me. You want me to be hated. However, I’ve shown that I am a kind person and that I am more trust worthy than you will ever be.

So, thank you! I am now enjoying life without you and creating meaningful friendships where you aren’t needed.

I wish you the best but if you continue down this path, everyone will realise the real you like I did.

Thanks for Reading Today!

Ross

How Music Saves My Life

Music is a passion of mine and it’s something I have spent so much money on and I am obsessed with. I like to sing and listen to new and old music and I don’t want to be cliche but there have been times where I’ve thought to myself: “music has saved my life”

This is due to the fact the artists have lyrics that represent certain moods and that I’ve connected so much to a song. So I would like to share what songs that in my personal experience have made me feel good and taken me out of my bad moods and helped me in my points of feeling low.

A song that I’ve connected with for years and a song that I listen to on a day to day basis would be Who You Are by Jessie J.

This song allows me to realise that I am my own individual person with hopes and dreams that differ from all of my friends and family and that I need to appreciate who I am and that no one will ever bring me down for not being what they want me to be. A lyric I have always connected with is “But tears don't mean you're losing, everybody's bruising, There's nothing wrong with who you are!”

I have shed many tears surrounding myself over the years and I have slowly learned that it’s okay to be me and do what I do! People around me feel the same things and I am my own personal

Recently, a song that has made its way into my life is human by Christina Perri. Sometimes you just need the reminder that everyone makes mistakes and that you can make it through life every day as everyone should be equal. It’s also a song that made me realise the toxic relationships I’ve had the past year.

“I can take so much, Till I've had enough” this is such an important lyric which I appreciate with all of my heart. I’ve taken as much as I can and I’ve had to get rid of friendships as I can’t take it anymore. This song also reminds me that I can do it and be who I am and that I am important.

In terms of musical theatre, a song that has saved my life’s many a time is Defying Gravity from Wicked. “They’ll never bring me down” is a lyric I think that we all need to remember. The show tells us that even being different, you can succeed as an individual in this world. I can’t defy gravity but I can stand up to those who want to ruin my days and nights and that I can do what I wish to do.

Praying by Kesha also needs a mention at this point. Due to a past experience that I don’t want to discuss, I have really connected to this song. “I’m proud of who I am. No more monsters I can breathe again”. I am proud of myself. I have fought through college for a qualification that means so much to me and I’ve also fought to keep friendships that I’m proud of creating. Those who want to tell others stories to try to bring you down about past experiences and to try turn people against you are not worth your time. Also acting like the big man because you have discovered something that a person wants no one to know tells people are horrible and this song helped me fight through this experience. I realised through this that I’m over this part of my life and have discovered what I truly want. So thanks, dude.

A final song I want to leave this blog with is nobody’s perfect by Jessie J. The full song symbolises that there isn’t any person in this world that is perfect and that everyone can make mistakes and we can fix them. This song has helped me so much the past year or so and it will continue to help me.

Thanks for Reading Today!

Ross